Seen

Oct. 17th, 2020 10:41 pm
esp_dragonv2: Werewolf head (Default)
[personal profile] esp_dragonv2
Fandom: Noblesse
Summary: M-21 hated being seen.
Notes: Written for the givethispromptatry prompt, 'Being overlooked evokes many different emotions, she thought. There’s anger and loneliness for sure, but there’s also a kind of security in it as well.'
Rating: PG-13
Genre: General
Word count: 1,046
Status: Complete



M-21 hated being seen. It meant he'd grabbed someone's attention, and that was never a good thing. It meant there was scrutiny, assessment. The chance to be found weak. Useless.

Useless people weren't wanted in the Union.

Being useless meant being disposed of. Thrown away like the trash he was.

Or it was the opposite: if he was seen, there was his chance his or M-24's transformations would be discovered, and then they would trapped in the labs again, never having the small amount of freedom they'd been allowed.

It was better to be overlooked. To be dismissed, gazes sliding off him, seeing him as unimportant.

Away from the harsh lights of the Union lab, M-21 flipped between wanting to hide in the shadows where it was safe, and demand to be seen. To be known that he lived when his comrades hadn't. To make any kind of mark on someone else's life, even or especially if it was through killing someone.

He'd made some kind of difference then. Proven he was still there.

That he was strong enough to live.

* * *

M-21's skin crawled as he worked at Ye Ran. He felt the stares as he walked the halls, the playground, from students and staff alike. Assessing him. Watching for weaknesses. Pretending wanting to talk to him. The fake giggles.

He heard the whispers that followed him. The gossip. Trying to figure out where he'd come from, his connection with Frankenstein.

He was away from the Union here, as safe as he could be, but he was also far more exposed, so many questions trying to pry into his business.

He'd done this in the Union already, had far too much experience deflecting or giving what the person thought they want.

He could do that here again.

* * *

M-21 closed his eyes when he shut the front door behind him, the house silent compared to the constant bustle of the street. This was much better, being away from people, where he could hear himself think.

Frankenstein was waiting for him in the living room, steaming teacup in hand.

Fuck.

What did he want? A report? Was he going to quiz him about his day? Had Frankenstein heard about all his mistakes and decided he wasn't worth the hassle to allow to stay in the house?

Frankenstein smiled at him over his teacup. "How was your day?"

That...was his version of a report? "Fine," M-21 said, eyeing him, watching for any tells that he'd given the wrong answer. How much detail would Frankenstein want? From what M-21 had seen of the scientist, Frankenstein was detail-orientated, who didn't miss anything, but if he could give the minimum without pissing Frankenstein off then he would.

"That's good," Frankenstein said, sipping his tea again and M-21 resisted narrowing his eyes at him - it would have been too obvious. That was it? Frankenstein was letting him go with just a one word reply?

Frankenstein raised his eyebrows at him. "Is there something else you want to tell me?"

"No." Shit, he'd said that too fast. It sounded like he was hiding something.

"All right."

Frankenstein wasn't suspicious? Before he fucked up again or Frankenstein asked more questions, M-21 left, straining his ears in case Frankenstein called him back.

* * *

M-21 was trembling by the time he got to his room. Shit. Was he really that weak to start breaking down after one conversation?

But a conversation with Frankenstein was different than the students or staff at the school. Frankenstein was a scientist. Someone who decided if he lived or died.

Being seen was bad enough, but being acknowledged he was there was worse. He couldn't just duck away when that happened. Everything had to be considered and weighed up when he was putting his life on the line by saying the wrong thing, giving too much information. It meant he'd gained too much attention and couldn't get away.

He sagged against the door, only locking his knees keeping him upright. Fuck, why was this so much worse? He hadn't fallen apart this badly whenever he'd talked to Union scientists or Crombell.

Because he'd known what to expect. He knew how the Union scientists reacted, what they wanted.

He could predict and make good guesses of what to say.

He didn't know Frankenstein - Frankenstein didn't act like a Union scientist and that... That scared M-21. Someone he couldn't predict made everything else uncertain.

The trembling worsened, M-21's breathing unsteady as he slid to the floor, running a hand through his hair.

And this time he was alone.

M-24 wasn't here.

He didn't have M-24 to talk things over with; he didn't have his comrade's presence at his side.

He was the last.

If he died, there would be no-one else who cared about finding his and his comrades' names.

Tears spilled over and he scrubbed at them, trying to keep quiet as he moved further into his room.

Being heard crying would draw attention, shown his weakness, and he couldn't afford that.

* * *

"Eeem!"

M-21 heard the call long before he felt Tao leap at his back, wrapping an arm around his shoulder.

"Ya didn't stop for me!" Tao said, his eyes wide.

"Because I knew you'd catch up," M-21 said, rolling his eyes. It would have been easy for him at a run.

Tao poked his cheek. "I can see ya smiling."

As M-21 batted Tao's hand away with a snort, Takeo came up on M-21's other side.

"So aaanyway," Tao said, "there's a new ice cream shop I heard about it, with a bunch of new flavours we haven't tried yet!"

Tao slipped his hand into M-21's and M-21 grabbed Takeo's out of habit as Tao pulled them along.

"We gotta hurry so we can beat the lines!"

"And you were mad I didn't wait for you?" M-21 muttered, keeping up with him.

"That's different. You didn't wait for me!"

M-21 snorted again, letting his smile show as Tao grinned back at him.

M-21 could feel people's gazes on them as they ran past but he didn't care. He welcomed it.

Being seen meant he was alive and he would do what he could to stay that way.

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