esp_dragonv2: Werewolf head (Default)
[personal profile] esp_dragonv2
Fandom: Noblesse
Summary: M-21 tries to adjust after M-24's death.
Contains: Panic attack and suicidal ideation.
Notes: Whoops, I thought I would have more of the next part done by the time I posted this, but no. So not sure when that'll be done or posted.
Rating: PG-13
Genre: General
Word count: 3,090
Total word count: 10,295
Status: Work in progress



M-21 frowned at his wrist. It had been a few hours since the wolf mark had turned itself into its old form. Normally, it could barely stay like that for five minutes before vibrating, trying to move.

Was something wrong? Was it...sick? A mark on his skin couldn't get sick, could it?

M-21 stared at the '21', but it didn't move.

There was someone there who would have a better idea what was wrong with it. If there was something wrong.

But it was so unnatural for it to be still for so long...

It couldn't have... It couldn't have died, could it?

M-21's stomach twisted.

He didn't want to ask Frankenstein questions, but this wasn't something he could look up himself.

* * *

"M-21?" Frankenstein's eyebrows went up when he saw M-21 entering his lab. "What's wrong?"

M-21 pursed his lips before exhaling. "What does it mean when the mark stops moving?"

"Stops...? I would guess sleeping, but I doubt that's the case. Can I see it?"

M-21 was able to stop himself from curling his lip as he walked over to Frankenstein. Presenting his tattoo to a scientist was normally a way of identification and dehumanisation in the Union. Proof he was just a number.

'Dehumanisation', hah...

M-21 pulled back his sleeve and showed his wrist to Frankenstein.

Frankenstein glanced at it. His brow furrowed. Fuck, was it bad?

"This...was what it used to be?" Frankenstein said.

Oh, right. "Yeah." The wolf had never went into its old form around Frankenstein.

"I see." Frankenstein studied it for a few seconds before looking back at M-21. "Can I touch it?"

M-21 stared at him blankly. "Yeah." Why was Frankenstein asking?

Frankenstein nodded and then ran a finger around the outside of the tattoo.

The tattoo vibrated. M-21 let out a breath of relief.

"It moved?"

"Yeah."

"Hm." Frankenstein took his hand back. "I unfortunately don't know that much about werewolves or their marks to give a definite answer. Master may have a better idea." His eyes drifted to the ceiling. "He's having tea right now and is willing to take a look."

M-21 followed Frankenstein out the lab. The mark was still moving. That was good.

Frankenstein's master was in the living room, his teacup back on its saucer when they entered. When he looked over, his eyes flicked to M-21's wrist.

Frankenstein must have told him about it already.

"Hm..."

"Master? You know what's wrong?"

Frankenstein's master nodded. "You were uncomfortable with him moving over your skin; he thinks you would feel better if he stayed in one place."

Oh. ...Fuck. It was because of him? He wanted to wrap his hand around his wrist but he didn't. Not in front of Frankenstein and his master. "I thought it might be changing me more when it did that."

"You are a...unique case," Frankenstein said, "but I doubt that is possible. Werewolves don't become more werewolf-like as the mark moves over them."

That made sense...

"The mark will grow with you," Frankenstein's master added. "He is a sign of how strong you are - it does not mean you are becoming less human."

"Okay." M-21 looked between them, waiting to see if there was anything else they would say.

Frankenstein's master turned back to his tea and Frankenstein went to the kitchen.

Right. M-21 retreated to his own room.

* * *

M-21 sat down at his desk, laying his arm down on it, wrist up. "Hey," he said, watching his tattoo. It didn't move.

He ran a finger along the side like Frankenstein had done. It vibrated.

M-21 smirked. Caught it. "I know you want to move. You don't have to stay like that anymore."

It vibrated again before stilling. It was a response, at least.

M-21 waited a few more seconds and his smirk faded. He sighed, pulling his sleeve over it again. "Yeah," he muttered, "I wouldn't trust someone who tried to kill me either."

Talking wouldn't help. It had been less than a day since he'd tried to rip it out - that wasn't long enough. "I'm...glad you aren't dead," he said to empty air. He'd lost enough already.

Nothing, not that M-21 was expecting one.

There wasn't anything else he could do, so he left the room.

* * *

"M-21...?"

He looked up from his plate; Frankenstein was watching him from across the table. Damn. Was he being obvious?

"Would you prefer something else to eat?"

M-21 shook his head, glancing at his empty palm before fisting his hand. "Just waiting for the food to cool." Every time he had food, he let the wolf mark see what it was before starting to eat - he'd been waiting for the familiar feel of the mark passing over his skin.

It might not be dead, but it almost felt like it.

He kept expecting to feel it running up his arm as he ate, checking that he was putting food in his mouth like it always did.

M-21 stopped eating after a few bites and left. It...didn't feel right.

Nothing did. Eating without M-24 at his side. Eating without the wolf mark checking everything he ate. Eating food that was so rich and had so much flavour each mouthful burned.

They let him go without comment.

He could still feel their eyes follow him.

* * *

M-21's heart hurt. Which was fucking hilarious. It wasn't his but it still hurt.

He wanted M-24 back.

He just... He couldn't think. Nothing made sense. Everything was different.

Was this any better than being at the Union? Or dead?

If he was dead, he would be with M-24 again. He would see the rest of his comrades.

He wouldn't have to think about what he was or would be.

He could just-

"Shit!" M-21 hissed, snapping his hand away.

The wolf glowered back from his wrist, fur arched up in a way M-21 had never seen it before. There was a red mark next to it, where it had bitten him.

"Wouldn't it be better for you if I did?" M-21 demanded. "You wouldn't be stuck to a fucking fail - fuck!"

The wolf barked at him, ears flat. M-21's skin was already bruising from the second bite, teeth marks visible.

"What the fuck do you want then?" M-21 spat. "You hate me so it'd be better for both of us-"

This time the wolf howled.

"What? I have no fucking idea what you're saying! Maybe if I actually was a fucking werewolf I'd understand you, but I'm not. I'm not even a fucking human anymore and-" He cut himself off with a strangled cry, his blood thundering in his ears again. Why did this keep happening? Why did everything keep spiralling out of control and he couldn't do anything about it?

Maybe even his heart was rejecting him and trying to kill him. If it went on for long enough, maybe he'd die.

Good. Everything hurt. He didn't want to think anymore. No-one would care anyway. There was no-one left.

Pressure against the side of his throat.

"Ff-fucck off." It was hard to get the words out through his hitching breathing. Hard to talk when the wolf was pressing itself against his windpipe.

Controlling how he was breathing.

"Fuck off!" He didn't want breathe properly. He didn't want to carry on. Why the fuck was the wolf doing this? Revenge for trying to kill it? Make him live?

Except saying that meant he breathed out, and the next time he breathed in, the wolf pressed against his throat again.

Bastard! Why? Tears collected in M-21's eyes and then his breathing was uneven for another reason.

He wanted to fucking scream but that would draw attention and he couldn't afford that.

He couldn't scream as he cried, loss and grief tight around his heart. The wolf stayed around his neck, crooning.

* * *

M-21 woke up with sunlight streaming in through his window.

Who cared. His body was still exhausted from the previous night, hunger pangs making themselves known.

Who fucking cared.

Why should he get out of b-

His skin buzzed, the wolf running all over.

M-21 groaned, squeezing his eyes shut. He'd missed the wolf's presence but he didn't fucking want to deal with-

The wolf tugged at his ear.

"What?" He scratched at it, grimacing.

It barked and then ran off again. All over everything he was lying on.

M-21 turned over, scratching where it'd ran over.

It did it again, over what he was lying on.

M-21 narrowed his eyes. "You want me to get up?"

A bark along his back.

"And you're going to be an annoying shit until I do?"

Another bark, with a few tail wags.

"Urgh, stubborn fucking asshole." M-21 pushed himself up, the wolf going to its usual vantage point at his jaw.

"Do you..." M-21 trailed off as he entered the bathroom. "Never mind." It didn't matter.

The wolf nipped his jaw.

M-21 scratched at it, the wolf jumping around his fingers. "You like doing that now, don't you?" It wasn't the same as its previous bites, enough for M-21 to feel, not to hurt.

A bark. And then another nip.

M-21 stared at his reflection in the mirror. It was weird seeing the wolf moving around his face, but that was better than not seeing it at all. "What?"

...He looked like shit, his hair clumped and messy, dark shadows under his bloodshot eyes. He felt like shit too. Was it really worth-

The wolf bit him.

Wait. M-21 narrowed his eyes at the wolf, the wolf staring back. "Are you biting me whenever...fuck." He could see the pattern now, but he didn't understand it. "Whenever I'm unhappy?"

​The wolf barked and then shook its head.

"Then I have no fucking idea why."

The wolf's ears flicked back.

Was he being fucking stupid and not understanding something simple?

This time the wolf pressed up against his jaw and then curled up up there.

"...Fine." He'd work out the pattern eventually.

The wolf wagged its tail.

Once M-21 was finished in the bathroom, he stared at his reflection again, bracing himself on the sink. "You don't hate me?" Why was it out again if it did?

A shake of the head.

"Oh. Okay." M-21 glanced away. "Thanks."

He got a soft nip for that before the wolf started dashing around his body.

He sighed, getting ready. It had been a while since the wolf had run around like it wanted so it wasn't surprising it was making up for it now.

* * *

M-21 glanced around the living room. No-one else there and he headed for the front door.

He slowed when the wolf barked in the direction of the kitchen. There was no-one there...?

The wolf kept barking until M-21 turned direction with a sigh. "What do you want?" he muttered.

He was led to the fridge and M-21 looked at it, his hunger pangs making themself known again.

"I don't need to eat right now." He'd gone longer without food.

He got a nip for that.

"Fine." He could take a few minutes to find something.

It didn't take long and he held his palm close to the food once he was done. "Does it pass your inspection?"

The wolf wagged its tail, and raced up to his face when he picked it up.

It was nice feeling it do that again.

While M-21 cleaned the plate after he finished eating, the wolf played with the water spray as it flowed over his skin. The wolf always checked his food before he ate. At the Union, when he was hungry the wolf would start paying more attention to food stores - M-21 had ignored it back then, because they'd be in the middle of a mission and had needed to keep a low profile.

M-21 frowned. It had always been like this. The wolf had always been trying to make sure he'd ate. Looking out for him. He just hadn't realised.

"Hey," M-21 said, turning the tap off. The wolf looked up at him, head tilted. "Thanks. For everything." And he'd repaid it by trying to ki-

The wolf nipped him.

M-21 frowned. He still couldn't figure out what it was reacting to.

It wasn't biting him at least.

* * *

M-21 entered Frankenstein's lab, his hands jammed in his pockets.

The scientist was standing in front of one of the tall machines, scribbling on a clipboard. He hadn't noticed M-21 yet and as M-21 approached, the top half of the machine rose up with a billow of steam.

M-21 exhaled, clenching his hands as the smoke cleared. What was in it? Blood samples? Body parts? What experiment was Frankenstein doing?

"Ah, excellent timing!" Frankenstein said, smiling at him. Fuck. What was he getting pulled into? "If I could have a few moments of your time?"

"...Sure." Frankenstein was asking like he had a choice. Weird.

Frankenstein hummed, reaching around the other side of the machine and pulled out...tongs and a plate? He used the tongs to pull out - M-21 frowned.

"I'm trying a new recipe and I would like your opinion on them."

The fuck? Frankenstein had presented him with cookies. Maybe it was a test for some new drug but M-21 couldn't smell anything.

...In fact... M-21 finally placed why this lab smelled weird, not like one from the Union.

It lacked the scent of blood.

It only smelled of food.

The wolf had already gone to his palm and was going around in circles, barking. Would it know if the cookies had been drugged?

It wouldn't matter anyway. He would have to eat them.

M-21 picked up a cookie and inspected it. It seemed like chocolate chip - he bit it and his teeth sank right through, the chocolate soft.

"How is it?" Frankenstein asked, his pen at the ready.

"Sweet," M-21 said after swallowing. The chocolate still coated the inside of his mouth, making the taste linger.

"Is it overpowering? Too sugary?"

M-21 shook his head. He'd tasted Frankenstein's cooking - it wasn't as strong in comparison.

"Great!" Frankenstein beamed at him. "You can take the rest."

M-21 stared at the filled rack in the machine. "All right." If he didn't get any side effects, it would take him a while to finish them all.

"Now then," Frankenstein said as M-21 collected the cookies, "what did you want to see me for?"

"My other results from the checkup," M-21 said, holding the plate. He wouldn't eat more yet.

Frankenstein nodded and went over to one of the computers that lined the wall. "They were as I expected considering your situation."

M-21 pursed his lips, following him.

It took a few quick clicks before a window popped up on screen, filled with numbers. Hn, that seemed like it was easy to get to.

"You're malnourished and more specifically have iron and vitamin d deficiencies," Frankenstein said, scanning the numbers.

M-21's stomach sank. "Pills then," he muttered. He'd just arrived and he was already getting tied to the new lab.

Frankenstein chuckled at that; M-21 was able to stop himself from curling his lip at the scientist. "The malnutrition and iron deficiencies can be dealt with through diet."

All that food Frankenstein had prepared for dinner... "And vitamin d?"

"Sunlight, at least thirty minutes every day."

What. But then...most of M-21's missions had taken place at night or underground.

"And that's it. Eat food and go outside?" That sounded far too easy.

"You'd be surprised how much that can affect, which brings me to my next point."

M-21 eyed him warily. What now.

"Your documents have been processed so you'll be able to start working at my school next week."

It was a waste of time pointing out he didn't have documents to process, or had given Frankenstein any details - Frankenstein must have pulled some strings to get him in.

"Fine." It might help give him something else to think about.

* * *

M-21 stared at himself in the mirror. The suit fit him, but it felt too restrictive.

He wasn't supposed to fight in it though. Just watch over some brats for a couple of hours.

The wolf circled his neck, scratching at the collar.

"Oi," he said, rubbing where it was. He could hear the collar tearing little by little. "Stop that."

A soft grumble as a reply, the wolf popping its head over his collar to look at him.

"I need to wear it for work." It was weird saying that. Work. He'd worked in the Union, but those had been missions. 'Work' was something unmodified humans did.

He was neither unmodified, or completely human.

And yet, there he was, standing in front of a mirror. Getting ready for 'work'.

"You have to stay hidden while I'm out during the day." It would draw attention if anyone saw the wolf mark.

The wolf huffed and then trailed down his arm. When it stopped at his wrist, he realised what it was going to do.

"You don't have to change," he said, pulling sleeve back. "Just stay out of sight." No-one at the school would know he used to have a tattoo.

The wolf perked up and with a wagging tail, started dashing around his body again.

It might be slightly distracting but it meant he knew it was there. That he wasn't completely alone.

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